I remember a time when I first began coaching. I was at Victoria High School. Our football team was "pretty" good, but what I remember is not that a win "put us in the playoffs" or that it brought us "a district championship," but rather I remember the moments just after the final seconds ticked off the clock of a game against our traditional rival. We had just won. There was excitement in the air. The band was playing the fight song! The cheerleaders were jumping up and down shouting "we won! we won!" The drill team members were shouting "We Won! We Won!" I remember looking into the stands and seeing the school principal and a counselor hugging (maybe more about that later) shouting, "We Won! We won!"
Then I remember looking at the team walking off the field. They were exhausted.
There were two "big 'ol linemen" walking off the field. They were LITERALLY dripping with sweat and blood. They were literally exhausted! Then slowly one of them raised his sweaty arm and placed it around the shoulders of his teammate; his brother in battle. With blood dripping from his elbow, and blood covering one eye he looked deep into his teammates eyes... Exhausted, he muttered "Doug, we won." Doug, too weak to even look back muttered "yeah John we did, didn't we." They walked silently arm in arm into the locker room, too tired to speak but each of them knew that only their brother in arms was aware of just what it took to gain this victory. The fans, cheerleaders, drill team, principal, and counselor enjoyed the fruits of a year's worth of these young men's labor.
I remember watching these young men walk, with arms around each other, totally exhausted, into the locker room. I remember thinking that a community of people celebrate a victory that a few young men (teenagers) literally bleed for. The very next week we lost a district game. The same people; cheerleaders, drill team, principal and counselor... were essentially damning "those boys that lost that game." It's funny how when the team wins "WE" win but when the team loses..... "THEY lose!"
Wednesday, November 11, 2009
NO STONE UNTURNED
To be honest I have had a devil of a time remembering how to submit a "blog." ... or maybe I just wanted "all" of my followers to think I had given up so that this could be just me talking to me.
Anyway, here we are the week of the state meet and I am reminded of so many years that I spent "transfixed" on all of the "what if's." As I watch Christie agonize through this week I can't help but think of the times that I spent where she is now. I continually tell her it's easy for me to look back on a career and say "I spent too much time worrying about the outcome... or "if I had it to do again, I would have approached these meets differently..." But I have come to realize that those words intended for comfort don't mean much. I suspect if I had a magic time machine, and went back to the mid-90's I would still feel much like she does now.
I will never forget the night before our first state championship. My wife, Pattie, had the patience of Job. I was so restless.... pacing the floor of our hotel room, literally all night. Her words will ever be etched in my mind... "Honey, try not to worry. They're going to do just fine." WHAT? She couldn't begin to know how they were going to do... How dare she pretend to understand my concerns... but, the fact was she did understand. My daily accountings to her of what Jason, Tim, Steve and crew had done throughout the year gave her an unbiased look at the future. Pattie couldn't (nor did she want to) predict the outcome. What she did know was that I loved those boys. I loved their work ethic, their up's and their down's. We had worked hard to get to this point, and she knew that they were likely as ready as they could be for this challenge. She also knew "that the outcome would not be the end-all;" that it would not define who I was as a human. She was so comforting that night. She was very delicate not to make light of my intense anxiousness, but was masterful at helping me realize that this was but one day in my life.... my career! I distinctly remember at one point around 2:30 AM getting up (not having been asleep) and standing in front of the hotel window, wondering if we had done all we could. Is there anything we could have done differently? Did the boys really believe they could overcome the Tradition, the Mystique of the mighty McCullough Highlanders. On most nights when I might have been restless, or even if I just snored too loudly, she might have been less than patient, but that night I'll never forget how kind she was. She knew I was in agony and would just say, "don't worry honey, they'll be fine." I didn't have to tell her what I was feeling, or what I was worried about. She knew and her words were a comfort that are impossible to describe. .... now don't get me wrong, they were not a sleep aid. I got little sleep that night! ... and it wasn't so bad. I remember a lot of great thoughts I had that night. I suppose the most profound moment was around 4:00 am when it dawned on me that God probably didn't care who won. I came to realize that what I believed was that God cared what we learned from this challenge that would help us better serve Him. Not long after that I dozed off (for about 45 mintes) then the wake up call. After that it was a blur! The next thing I know my friend (and McCullough Highlander head coach) Dan Green is congratulating us on a great state championship!
Now don't be misled. I'm selfish. I want my baby-girl to win this thing more than anything. She has endured some great hardships up to this point. She has left this meet thinking her team had won only to find out the following Monday that they hadn't... and then had to tell her team! I never had to do that, and don't know how I would have handled it. She has been so close. In pure human terms, and to quote my friend Larry Gnatzig "if anyone deserves this Christie does." She pours her heart into this. She loves these girls beyond their potential contribution to the team. It's time! I wish I could take away her burden of worry, but I can't. No..... I'm afraid that she has to go through this herself. I could tell her that I "think" her team is ready to win this thing (which I do), or I could tell her how much more positive this team is than the past two that I've observed. I could tell her that this team seems to be more focused on what they intend to accomplish than what they fear might happen, but it really boils down to the fact that she has invested more than all of the girls combined. Oh, they have invested much in this season. They have worked through adversity like a good coach hopes his/her athletes have to... I mean if we really are trying to prepare them for life! ... but, with all due respect to the girls on the team, their investment pails in comparison to what their coach has put into this season. So it stands to reason that she would be anxious. She should be anxious. No cliche' could make light of what the next three days mean to her. She thinks this is what she is about (As odd or distorted as that may sound) She, as she should, says that she really just wants the girls to run their best and be able to walk away from Old Settler's Park with no regrets. I believe that what she truly hopes for is to be able to get on the bus after the meet and look at them and know she had done her best by them AND that they could look in the mirror and know they had done all they could... that they had left no stone unturned!
Go Lady Mustangs THIS IS YOUR DAY!
Anyway, here we are the week of the state meet and I am reminded of so many years that I spent "transfixed" on all of the "what if's." As I watch Christie agonize through this week I can't help but think of the times that I spent where she is now. I continually tell her it's easy for me to look back on a career and say "I spent too much time worrying about the outcome... or "if I had it to do again, I would have approached these meets differently..." But I have come to realize that those words intended for comfort don't mean much. I suspect if I had a magic time machine, and went back to the mid-90's I would still feel much like she does now.
I will never forget the night before our first state championship. My wife, Pattie, had the patience of Job. I was so restless.... pacing the floor of our hotel room, literally all night. Her words will ever be etched in my mind... "Honey, try not to worry. They're going to do just fine." WHAT? She couldn't begin to know how they were going to do... How dare she pretend to understand my concerns... but, the fact was she did understand. My daily accountings to her of what Jason, Tim, Steve and crew had done throughout the year gave her an unbiased look at the future. Pattie couldn't (nor did she want to) predict the outcome. What she did know was that I loved those boys. I loved their work ethic, their up's and their down's. We had worked hard to get to this point, and she knew that they were likely as ready as they could be for this challenge. She also knew "that the outcome would not be the end-all;" that it would not define who I was as a human. She was so comforting that night. She was very delicate not to make light of my intense anxiousness, but was masterful at helping me realize that this was but one day in my life.... my career! I distinctly remember at one point around 2:30 AM getting up (not having been asleep) and standing in front of the hotel window, wondering if we had done all we could. Is there anything we could have done differently? Did the boys really believe they could overcome the Tradition, the Mystique of the mighty McCullough Highlanders. On most nights when I might have been restless, or even if I just snored too loudly, she might have been less than patient, but that night I'll never forget how kind she was. She knew I was in agony and would just say, "don't worry honey, they'll be fine." I didn't have to tell her what I was feeling, or what I was worried about. She knew and her words were a comfort that are impossible to describe. .... now don't get me wrong, they were not a sleep aid. I got little sleep that night! ... and it wasn't so bad. I remember a lot of great thoughts I had that night. I suppose the most profound moment was around 4:00 am when it dawned on me that God probably didn't care who won. I came to realize that what I believed was that God cared what we learned from this challenge that would help us better serve Him. Not long after that I dozed off (for about 45 mintes) then the wake up call. After that it was a blur! The next thing I know my friend (and McCullough Highlander head coach) Dan Green is congratulating us on a great state championship!
Now don't be misled. I'm selfish. I want my baby-girl to win this thing more than anything. She has endured some great hardships up to this point. She has left this meet thinking her team had won only to find out the following Monday that they hadn't... and then had to tell her team! I never had to do that, and don't know how I would have handled it. She has been so close. In pure human terms, and to quote my friend Larry Gnatzig "if anyone deserves this Christie does." She pours her heart into this. She loves these girls beyond their potential contribution to the team. It's time! I wish I could take away her burden of worry, but I can't. No..... I'm afraid that she has to go through this herself. I could tell her that I "think" her team is ready to win this thing (which I do), or I could tell her how much more positive this team is than the past two that I've observed. I could tell her that this team seems to be more focused on what they intend to accomplish than what they fear might happen, but it really boils down to the fact that she has invested more than all of the girls combined. Oh, they have invested much in this season. They have worked through adversity like a good coach hopes his/her athletes have to... I mean if we really are trying to prepare them for life! ... but, with all due respect to the girls on the team, their investment pails in comparison to what their coach has put into this season. So it stands to reason that she would be anxious. She should be anxious. No cliche' could make light of what the next three days mean to her. She thinks this is what she is about (As odd or distorted as that may sound) She, as she should, says that she really just wants the girls to run their best and be able to walk away from Old Settler's Park with no regrets. I believe that what she truly hopes for is to be able to get on the bus after the meet and look at them and know she had done her best by them AND that they could look in the mirror and know they had done all they could... that they had left no stone unturned!
Go Lady Mustangs THIS IS YOUR DAY!
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